brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
it hurts more in the daytime
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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