and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Enjoy the penises
I said "one day" and that day is not today
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
