We're facebook friends in real life
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Randomize
