My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
