I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Randomize