How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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