Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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