Your face is a jimmy john
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
