He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
