so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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