she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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