I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Randomize
