Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize