Tell her she can't have a vagina
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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