i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
All the doctor said was why
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
