I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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