were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
