he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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