Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
"it" just moved
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
