the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
