I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Randomize
