Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Randomize
