you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
