I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
