The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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