well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
