meet me or not, i'm out of control
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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