He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
This is my gift to your gina
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Randomize
