the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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