can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
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