Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
