if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
