Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
