And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
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