Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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