so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
