So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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