What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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