I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Randomize
