he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
