Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Randomize
