dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
