There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
