is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
i've created a new STD.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
