Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
