Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
