well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
