why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
