so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
