the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
